When I was just a tiny kid,

  I really needed friends

  To help with all the things I did,

  Be with me till the end.

  But friends of flesh, they do not stay

  And they make fun of me.

  A friend of rubber buy I may —

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  I guess friendship's not free.

  My parent never understood.

  But you solved every problem.

  You never needed any food,

  But were always there for me.

  With you, I won't return to voids

  Of loneliness and fear.

  Oh yeah, I used to fear sigmoids

  But that has disappeared.

  If I'm in doubt, I'll tell you all

  The things that don't make sense,

  Then my mistakes I will recall.

  Yeah, ducks aren't at all dense —

  They float in water. When there's bread,

  Their algorithm is greedy.

  Of all the birds they're the most rad

  And their pace is quite speedy.

  They swim, they fly, what else's to want?

  And if the truth's to blossom,

  The rubber ones can have hats on

  And that is really awesome.