"I, Sabaziol Price, the free spirit, shall venture forth into the wide world. One day, they shall say, there goes the great soul that pioneered the wonderful afterlife. They shall... argh, no! No, bad Saba. Not for them. Nothing for them anymore. I'm changed now. I shall change for myself. There's value in change. Heh. Value in change."

  "Life's so different already. I mean, do I still call existence life? Am I speaking? I have no mouth. Am I thinking then? Without a brain. What a conundrum. Golly, such a pretty bee. Wonder where it's going. I shall leave this cantankerous pair behind. The three of us resemble a bargain-bin team rocket. Preposterous. No, the bee'll be better."

  "What does this bee know? I mean, a single bee, by itself, is nothing. Just a bug. Their real value is communication. Look, a garden. Of course. It must have known of the flowers. Such a pretty garden too. Wait, did I just pass through a keyhole? What the actual fuck? What else can I do?"

  "I do see. And hear. Hmm, no taste? Touch? Smell? Am I just another floating holograph like those school wizard movies? Fuck, where's the bee? Oh, there."

  Zippp..

  "What!?... Cool!!! Freaking teleport? Life's good. Here we go."

  Half an hour later.

  "This is such bullshit. Did I use up my charge or what? I can't do jack shit."

  Another half hour later.

  "Screw this. Where's the bee?"

  10 minutes later.

  "Screw this. I'm bored."

  A car starts in the distance.

  Zipp..

  "Sweet. Let's fucking go."

  Saba grabs the door, that doesn't budge. And yet, he finds purchase.

  "Touch, check. Now, how do I go in. Oh, hey Jason. Can you let me in? Of course you can't. You poor bastard. You don't hear me, do you? Oh come on, little girl, don't cry. You know what, I'm fine here."

  "We have to confess, Jason. We killed him. I'm so scared. It was all so planned. You said...."

  "Joy. Please get a grip. Let me think about it."

  "But-"

  "Please, Joy. Listen. You have to get a grip. I'll drop you at work. The work will be your alibi. Act normal, don't do anything stupid. Ok?"

  "..."

  "Do you trust me?"

  "... Yes?"

  "Good. We were stupid, alright? And a little high. I'll contact the others, come up with something. We'll be fine. We'll be just fine."

  "Ok."

  "Oh my, the weather is so nice out here. The wind, how it rustles my hair. DO I HAVE HAIR? Jason, Joy, do I have hair? Do I? Hey, you, staring at the screen, yes you, do I have hair? Can you see this middle finger I am raising at you? Of course you can't, you dumb slag. No, no. You are not to blame. Life must have been hard for you. I'm probably responsible for half the shitty problems in this city. Makes you think, huh..."

  This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

  "I never went down in the ghetto. Well, technically I did. I had to kidnapped. They really did find me dead before I would be caught in this shithole. Oh the irony. I could have been batman you know, fourth wall. I could have helped these people. But no, I valued money and power more."

  "What even is value. Economics says money is value. Right? An objective store of subjective value. A contradiction, a dilemma, a thing that cannot value itself. None of these miserable folk probably value money as much as my old peers. The rich are rich because they value money, a lot more than the artists and the nurses and the teachers. And yet, we made paper bills and portfolios the easy answer to hard questions. I would know. We sold so many lies, my journalists and I. Oh, look, an ice-cream truck. I thought they didn't exist anymore. Fuck, why am I stuck to this damned door. This sucks."

  Zipp..

  "Aw man. This really sucks. So close too. Do you know that feeling, where your face is squished against the cylindrical glass of the ice-cream freezer, where you can see everything up close, can almost taste it? Well, let me tell you, it is excruciating. I didn't know I could feel pain. My face is going numb. How is this even possible? Is there no book of the dead? Fuck the ice-cream, the handle was much better."

  Zipp...

  "Can I take it back? Can I wish for a ice-cream cone? Can we not stop by a store or something. Pretty please, with sugar on top... Oh wow. Go Jason. Did I just wish this into being? Should have read those Power of Wish sellouts..."

  "Can I stay here?"

  "We talked about this, Joy. It is best if we act normal. He was a shithead, He deserved it."

  "Hey! Watch your mouth, boy. I did deserve it though, but still..."

  "But still... How are we any different, Jason?"

  "I know, Joy, please. Just do it this once. For me."

  "Ok."

  "Eventually, Joy fixes a bit, and gets off. Jason watches that perky ass, uhm, that delicate soul cross the empty parking lot and unlock the store. She turns, but once, and doesn't look back again. And here, Jason sits, broken and battered, his mask falling apart as he stares at his hands. Horror, resignation, irritation. He rubs his face, and turns off the car, reclining... Fuck yeah! I'm free. At last. The door gods are merciful, though tardy. Who cares. There's the store. With all that ice-cream."

  Zipp..

  "Here's the store! Love this place. Oh, there's already a cashier, here. Sweet. Now, let's see where's... Oh, where are my manners. Hello miss, how do you do. Can you point me to the frozen foods?"

  Beatrice looked up in surprise, pointing her finger to his right.

  "Much obliged! Pew pew pew pewpew..."