We watched the JDF craft shoot over us on their way to intercept the Free Enterprise, then went back to work. Vanessa had taken over flying duties and I didn’t feel like resting so I persuaded Zia to let me have a look at the wrist-com she’d stolen from the Special Agent. She’d wisely put it in a sturdy metal box out in one of the containers and I was quite surprised the Agent hadn’t pressed the self-destruct button.

  I put on the FYT suit and sent Zia to the front of the module where she perched on the Captain’s chair armrest and engaged Vanessa in conversation which was a brave move in itself but Vanessa must have been in a good mood and allowed her to stay.

  The wrist-com itself was a beautifully constructed device that must have cost a fortune and I could understand why the Agent hadn’t set off the self-destruct. It took me nearly an hour using the FYT suit’s built in tools and magnifier for me to open the device without setting off the booby trapped detonator and to remove the tiny amount of explosive within. I spent another hour hacking the software back to almost standard manufacturer spec, only leaving out the OEM spyware before copying the Agent’s data to a physical memory card.

  When the job was finished, I removed the suit and went to present the wrist com to Zia. Vanessa was still at the controls but was now dressed in a shipsuit that had been configured to look identical to Zia’s. The two of them saw my surprised look, Zia dissolved into giggles while Vanessa looked amused and I felt my face heat up.

  “What’s with the identical white shipsuits?” I asked. Rather than answer, Zia grabbed my arm and, smiling to herself, opened my shipsuit control panel and started to make adjustments. I looked to Vanessa for support but she merely grinned at me as my suit turned white and got tighter, but not uncomfortably so.

  “Happy now? I asked Zia when she finally released my arm.

  “Yes, much. Now we’re a proper crew.”

  “You’re right, it does suit him,” Vanessa said to Zia.

  “It does, doesn't it,” Zia said to her, then turned her attention back to me, “Did you have any luck with the wrist com?” I grinned and gave her the device and the memory card.

  “All fixed, I’ve physically removed the explosive inside and sanitised the device so you can now wear it. That memory card is all the Agent’s data. No doubt Jeckon Intelligence is going to have fun with that. Zia ignored the card and held up the wrist-com as if it were some precious jewel as she inspected it.

  “This looks like a real Hurch,” she said in awe.

  “It’s a well made piece of kit, I don’t think it’s standard issue, even for Special Agents,” I allowed.

  “Too fucking right. These things cost more than I make in a year,” Zia said, taking off her own battered wrist-com and sliding the Hurch one onto her wrist. She held her arm up to admire it. “You think I’ll be allowed to keep it?”

  “If it’s as exclusive as you say, I wouldn’t try to sell it, but you’ll probably get away with wearing it,” I said.

  “That’s good enough for me. Thank you, Captain,” Zia said, kissed me on the cheek, and disappeared off to her bunk, no doubt to set up her new toy. I double checked she wasn’t coming back and looked at Vanessa who grinned at me.

  “I like her, she’s fun,” Vanessa said.

  “I thought she’d be a bit much for you.”

  “Nah, she’s a sweet thing. Being mean to her would be like punching a puppy.”

  “I thought puppy punching was one of your hobbies,”

  “I am allowed to like some people,” Vanessa said, then gave me a sly grin, “even if she does have a major crush on you.”

  “She doesn’t.”

  “Oh she does, she invited both of us to join her polycule when we reach Kacke and I’m pretty sure it wasn’t just the novelty of my furry bits that led her to make the offer.”

  “Wait, she’s in a polycule?”

  “Bran, you’ve been travelling with her for how long? Have you not discussed her personal life at all?”

  “That never came up… And a polycule? that’s a bit adventurous.”

  “If you hadn’t noticed, she's an adventurous kinda girl. And don’t be an old fart about it. Times have changed, or they have here. About a quarter of Jeckon’s population considers themselves part of a multi partner relationship.” Vanessa reached up and grabbed my face, her claws extending enough to force me down on to the chair next to her so my eyes level were with hers, “I declined the offer gracefully by the way, so don’t get any ideas,” she said, looking into my eyes, the slits of her pupils wide.

  “Does this mean you expect us to kiss and make up?” I asked, trying to sound combative but I wasn’t fooling either of us.

  “You are the one bringing up stuff I did a century ago which I’ve already explained was for our mutual benefit.” Vanessa glanced back in Zia’s direction and lowered her voice, “And as soon as we have some privacy, feel free to put your hot new rejuvenated body to the use I intended it to be put to, even if it’s just for old time’s sake.” She released my face and continued in a normal voice, “and you owe me over a century of wedding anniversary presents. For starters I need a wrist-com, my wrist is bare.” Vanessa held up her skinny wrist for me to examine.

  “Fine, Mrs Hawk, I’ll get you a wrist com,” I sighed. Vanessa smiled.

  Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  “No-one’s dared to call me Mrs Hawk for a very long time. Make it a good one. I’m tired of hacking stolen stuff and Zia let slip you’re getting paid for this shit.”

  “Yeah, I’m currently a Captain in the Jeckonian Navy,” I said smugly. Vanessa shook her head and sighed.

  “With your past record they should have made you an Admiral at least.”

  “The last time any government made me an Admiral I permanently borrowed half their fleet so I can’t really blame them, not to mention my tactical knowledge is a century out of date. But the Captaincy does come with diplomatic immunity and a command.”

  “Bran, the book you wrote on Space Combat a hundred and forty years ago is still used by every military academy out there. While we were gone there has been no technological growth of any kind. Most normal people never travel off their home planets now, let alone travel out of human controlled space. Humanity has stagnated.”

  “If every military academy out there uses my book, that must mean I’m owed a shit ton of royalties.” I said. Humanity has always been one stupid decision away from at least one extinction level disaster but me being owed large amounts of money was an event unique in human history.

  “You would be if all your assets hadn’t been seized by the Galactic Court.”

  “The bastards…” I was just about to ask Vanessa what she’d been doing in the ten years since she’d been unfrozen when Zia returned, she smiled knowingly at the two of us cosying up together. I resisted the urge to pull away from Vanessa. It wasn’t as if we’d been doing anything, and, as Vanessa had not so subtly reminded me we were still married.

  “We’ve got docking clearance… whoever’s flying needs to go here,” Zia flicked some details from her shiny new wrist com to the main screen. It was only then I realised we’d left the featureless Ice Plains and were passing over hills, most of them covered with the low bumps of long-abandoned, snow-covered spacecraft. We were closer to Kacke than I’d estimated, or , given the obscure nature of the docking clearance, we were heading towards some kind of government facility. Vanessa ceded control of the airship to me and disappeared with Zia to the back of the module for a medical checkup that seemed to involve rather more whispering and giggling than your average checkup.

  The abandoned, snow-covered spacecraft increased in density until they were in neatly ranked lines with only a few metres between each craft. Here and there we passed over the bright lights of a salvage crew stripping a spacecraft for parts, but only a few. When I’d last been on Jeckon, the salvage crews had numbered in their thousands and their lights had lit up the sky at night.

  We approached the coordinates which turned out to be an ancient space vessel, its dimensions measuring in kilometres. Judging by the uneven warping of the hull, it had never been designed to come planetside and looked to be collapsing under its own weight. I briefly considered the sheer technical challenge of getting such a vast vessel down to the planet in one piece without it disintegrating or making a huge crater before deciding I was glad it hadn’t been my problem.

  Proximity alarms sounded, then, when I made no change to my course, silenced abruptly. Zia and Vanessa appeared either side of me to watch our approach.

  “Wow I’ve never seen one that big,” Zia giggled, looking at the screen.

  “It’s a Zarathian Battle Carrier, designed to capture entire planets in one go then strip the system of resources. Seven of them were destroyed and two captured. The other one’s in orbit around Earth.” Vanessa said. We both looked at her. “Don’t look at me like that. I did a history degree when I was in prison and my dissertation was on the Human - Zarathian war.” Vanessa said.

  “Does that mean we’re going to land in a real alien spaceship,” Zia asked. Vanessa and I exchanged glances. Probably half the ship hulls here were of alien manufacture or had alien made engines. The fact that a well-educated person who’d grown up on Jeckon wasn’t aware of this came as a surprise to both of us.

  Two stripped-down heavy cargo drones appeared and latched on to the airship’s envelope. I cut the engines, set the buoyancy to neutral and let the drones drag us into an opening large enough to make our airship feel small. The drones flew us through a hangar, full of JDF liveried airships, shuttles and a few space capable vessels and through another huge door opening into a larger, much darker space. I got the impression of larger, spaceship shaped shadows before we were reversed into a brightly lit bay big enough to house a heavy cruiser. The drones placed us gently on the floor in between huge salvage machines that gave the impression they were poised to rip our little airship apart..

  “Welcome, welcome. Forgive us for our lack of communication but we do try keep radio silence around the base. If you could make your way to the doors at the back of the bay we will meet you there. You don’t need to bring anything apart from yourselves, you will be reunited with your possessions shortly.” a friendly sounding, slightly camp voice said over comms.

  We made our way silently out the airship though the missing container door and across the huge bay, the echo of only sound. We reached the human sized door, before opening it I turned and looked at the craft that had taken us halfway across the planet. Here, it looked small, tatty and out of place. I sighed and opened the door. Giving up a command was always a wrench.

  We entered a corridor around four metres in diameter with red lines painted on the floor. It was clean, but gave off ancient space station vibes, which, given the Zarathian wars had taken place over four… no five hundred years ago this was hardly surprising. A smartly dressed, androgynous JDF Captain standing next to a transport module saluted us. I saluted them back.

  “Captain Hawk, Captain Von Dack and Lieutenant-Doctor Surex, welcome aboard the Death to All Humans, I am Captain Dany and I will be overseeing your debriefing which I will try to make as brief and as pleasant as possible before we release you upon Kacke for a few days well deserved leave. They turned and smiled at Vanessa who was just about to say something, probably something quite rude.

  “Captain Von Dack, as a private citizen you are not, of course, required to attend any debriefing but we would appreciate a statement from you regarding the crimes committed against yourself. I have also been told to tell you that your presence and activities on the planet are not counter to our own and you will not be censured.”

  “So, what happens to me then?” Vanessa asked.

  “Well, Dr Surex has recommended you spend a short time in a medical pod, then you have an audience with the Great Know All. How exciting is that?

  “Errr… How long in a medical pod, exactly?” Vanessa asked. Captain Dany patted her arm reassuringly.

  “Oh, don’t worry, it’ll only be a few days, and this time the pod’s all been specially set up for you. You’ll have plenty of time to see the sights and do some shopping afterwards.”

  “I doubt I’d be welcome in Kacke anyway. If you haven’t noticed, I am a Neko,” Vanessa said.

  “The first one I’ve ever met too, so cute too… all of you are in your white shipsuits.”

  “What is it about white…?” I started to ask, but Vanessa dug her claws into my arm to silence me.

  “Of course I am cute. My species was bred to be cute. But I was left to die in a pod. If you hadn’t noticed, a lot of people on this planet have something against my species.”

  “That may be true in the outback, but here in Kacke, you will find us rather more cosmopolitan and accepting. The Great Know All has asked General Peaks to personally take command of the investigation to track down the people who were meant to be caring for you and we expect to arrest them very soon. Please rest assured we take your well-being extremely seriously.”

  “You do? Why?” Vanessa asked.

  “Because the Great Know All has commanded us to look after you. Now, can you please get in the car and we’ll go somewhere more comfortable than this draughty corridor.”