We stepped out of the car once we arrived. There was a lot to contend with here. At first I thought it was a misunderstanding. That I had only imagined it. Perhaps Laura was just mistaken about how long I’d been asleep. But then… I recalled that day I went to Zoey’s house with Gwen. How my vision shifted to the girl who was down on the ground for a brief moment. I’d initially thought I had imagined it but… had I hacked her without even realizing it back then?

  “Spirit, get out here,” I said.

  After a moment of silence, small ripples began to spill out from my shadows. A shadowy figure slowly emerged like a creature out of the surface of a lake. The horns protruding out of the white skull rose past my head, until the creature hung about four feet above me.

  Hello, Tristan.

  I ignored the greeting of the daunting spirit before me and kicked a pebble. “Is what she said true? Can I really hack people while awake?”

  It is possible. But I will correct Laura on one thing.

  “Yeah? What is it?”

  What you are projecting is not your consciousness, but the spirit link, namely myself. You are better off thinking of it as shooting an arrow with a rope attached to the end rather than a projection of your own soul. The difference is relevant because, as your soul is still seated within your body, without the paralysis available during what you call REM sleep, your body moves along to every movement of the target’s.

  At his words, I turned to Laura, who had just gotten done closing up her car and had walked towards me. “Is this true?”

  “Is it true? Hmm. Well, you were moving around and mumbling while you were meditating, if that’s what you mean.”

  The paralysis offered to your body during REM sleep. I hadn’t thought about it like that. So it’s not as useful as a REM hack. I could probably end up hurting myself if I’m not careful. I could have jumped out of the car if I moved around enough by mistake.

  “What about my senses?” I asked the spirit. “It was kinda hard to see and hear…”

  That, Tristan, depends on your ability to immerse yourself. The link was hazy because your concentration was not perfect. But with practice, you may be able to produce a link as stable as you do while you’re asleep.

  “Meditation practice, in other words,” Laura said. “Have you ever meditated before?”

  “Well, besides earlier, I think I just…”

  She placed her palm on my upper back and walked me towards the school campus.

  “You just what?”

  Her action had caused me so much surprise that I wound up forgetting everything that I was about to say.

  “Um, uh… Yeah, no. Never. I mean, I’ve tried it before, but I didn’t really get it. When I was a kid, I always thought you’d levitate if you did it right, so when it didn’t work out like that I’d get bored and go do something else.”

  “Levitate? You were a cute kid, weren’t you?”

  “Oh, leave me alone. I’m sure you had some dumb ideas of your own when you were a kid.”

  “I probably… still have those dumb ideas,” she muttered.

  Her words were cold. Laced with a gentle melancholy that I couldn’t quite place. They caused me to turn to view her face. But in the end, all I could make out was the neutral expression that she had always worn. What was she thinking? What did she mean by dumb ideas?

  As we finally approached one of the student dorms, I felt more and more eyes on me. It’s like they could tell that I was a high school student or something. Even when we stepped inside, the eyes never left me. They were making me anxious.

  You are quite anxious, Tristan.

  Shut up, man. I know that already. I turned to look for the spirit, but it appeared that he had already sunk back into my shadow.

  “Are you okay?” Laura asked.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Did you tell Enzo we were coming?”

  “Yep, he’s expecting us at 3:30.”

  I pulled my phone out to check the time. 3:17, so we were a couple of minutes early. It was better than being late, but I did hope that he wasn’t late himself. It’d be terribly inconvenient for us if he was. I wouldn’t want to burden her to take me all the way back home. Deer Valley State was a ways off from my place compared to my high school, as you need to cross through the downtown area just to get there. A part of me kind of resented my parents for not allowing me to own a car already, as I felt like a burden relying on everyone around me. I also understood though that I’m not working yet so I’m not exactly entitled to anything. . But still, inconveniencing everyone around me made me feel…

  You feel quite guilty, don’t you Tristan?

  “Shut up,” I muttered.

  I was getting pretty sick of this spirit.

  “Guilty?” She stopped as we were halfway up a staircase. “Why do you feel guilty, Tristan?”

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  When I heard that question coming from Laura, it brought back memories of that night. I remember how she looked in that hotel room. How she… felt. I remember her voice. Her…

  I defiled her. The girl to my left, I… I defiled her. This sweet girl. I remember the lust. I remember how she looked. I remember the feeling of finishing in the condom. I remember…

  “I think I’m gonna be sick,” I said.

  “Tristan? Here, take a seat. Let’s rest.”

  She lowered me down onto the landing of the staircase to take a seat and recenter myself. She was seated right besides me.

  “That spirit, man… why’s he got such a big mouth?”

  I felt her gently touch against my back. She was trying to soothe me. “It’s okay Tristan. You have nothing to feel guilty about.”

  “But I… you…”

  “You didn’t know what you were getting into, okay? Besides, you saved me.”

  “How… are you so okay with this?”

  Three male students walked past us in a group, talking about something undecipherable to me at that moment in time. Laura seemed to take the moment to collect herself.

  “I’m not. I’m not okay, Tristan.”

  When I heard those words, I felt the whole world close in around me.

  “Laura, I’m so…”

  “But I’m not going to make myself a victim. I refuse to.” I felt her grip on my shirt tighten. “To be honest I felt like giving up on everything after Sunday night. I’d sunken into this deep, dark place where everything kept on replaying around me. The betrayal… everything. You don’t know how my… or, I guess you do know how my heart sank when I saw that video.”

  I still felt sick from that feeling days after the hack. I even felt sick listening to her.

  “I feel guilty too, you know? This was what I got for betraying my faith. For doing what was so wrong. I kept blaming myself for it. For the past twenty-four hours, all I could think about was how the world would be a better place without me.

  “But you know? After speaking to you, after learning about all the guilt you were carrying, I thought to myself. And I thought about how pointless it was for you to feel that way about it.”

  “Pointless?” I asked.

  A single girl walked up the stairs past us. She eyed the two of us for a split moment before continuing up to her destination.

  “You’re still a kid, Tristan. I know I’m not that much older, but I can see it in you. You’re just a high school kid. Of course you’re going to make mistakes when you have something as dangerous as that at your disposal.”

  “That’s why I should get rid of it though,” I said.

  But she shook her head.

  “You’re a kid, but you’re not bad. At least, I don’t think you are. I think it’s safer in your hands than in the hands of a lot of other people, right? I mean, think of all the terrible things you could do with something like that. You can control other people from possibly around the world. Politicians, billionaires, celebrities. There’s so many ways you could have exploited it to make your life better than it already is. You haven’t even used it that much if you really think about it.”

  “I…”

  I’m scared.

  I didn’t want to tell her that the only reason I hadn’t done any of that is because I was scared.

  Of course I was curious. I’m only human, after all. But I feel guilty about that too. I’ve thought of killing people, of stealing from the rich, of violating women. Of course I’ve had intrusive thoughts like those. But is my unwillingness to act on those thoughts simply because I have such a great moral compass, or is it that I’m terrified of what will happen if I do it? Am I not being corrupted by this power if I’m having such terrible thoughts in the first place?

  “Tristan, look at me.”

  My head shifted, and I met her eyes. They were resolute. Strong.

  I had never seen Laura Young look so determined before.

  “The spirit himself said so, didn’t he? He believed that you’re a kind person. I believe that you are too. It’s okay to have bad thoughts sometimes. Everyone does. Everyone has that one co-worker or ex that they think about strangling or punching in the face sometimes. But what matters in this world is actions, not thoughts. It doesn’t matter as much that you think about donating to charity as much as actually doing it, you know? It goes both ways. Just because you think about doing bad things with your powers, the important thing is that you don’t do it. You can undo thoughts, but you can’t undo actions, you know?”

  “But… I have. Ben. I…”

  She pulled me into a hug. I felt her warmth on me. I felt her breath brushing through the strands of my hair.

  “That you feel regret is good, Tristan. In fact, it’s good that you didn’t do something worse than that. You learned your lesson with something that can be fixed. Some things can’t be fixed.”

  I placed my arms around her. Some things can’t be fixed. She was going through so much. I felt for her, and she felt for me. It was comforting, in a way. I suddenly didn’t feel as lonely as I had moments earlier.

  “I’m so sorry, Laura.” I bit my lip. “I’m so sorry that happened to you. You didn’t deserve that.”

  “It’s fine Tristan, thank you.”

  I wanted to stay here forever. I didn’t care that we were in public or anything like that. I’ve just felt so lonely with all of this for so long, that Laura’s assurance had made me feel better than the past three weeks of therapy had. She was a soothing presence for me. I want her to be happy. She deserves to be happy.

  “I’m sorry Laura. I…”

  The sound of a camera’s shutter going off. I pulled away and turned to face the direction of the sound.

  “My, oh my. Lawrence is gonna gobble this up.”

  I’d recognized that face.

  “Hello Enzo,” Laura said.

  “Yo. You two make a cute couple. Are you official yet, or am I gonna be the one to break the good news?”

  “Very funny,” Laura said, standing up.

  “Ain’t no joke, sweet girl. Your brother’s been a pain in my ass for a while now. Or what, do you not have anything you wanted to talk to me about?”

  “Asshole,” I muttered.

  Laura placed her hand on my chest. “Let’s just go. Lead the way.”

  Enzo grinned. “Good girl.”

  I didn’t think that Lawrence would react terribly to the photo on a normal day, but it certainly didn’t help anything after what he was shown the day before. The real issue was whether Laura herself would be fine with it. It was entirely possible that Enzo could corner her with it in order to prevent her from worrying her brother too much. Once we got up the stairs, we only had to walk a couple steps to come up to Enzo’s door.

  When he opened it, he turned back to face the two of us.

  “Laura only.”

  “I’m not going in alone,” Laura said firmly. “I want Tristan to come with me.”

  He shrugged. “Guess you’ve come all this way for nothing then.”

  “Okay, guess we have. Come on Tristan.”

  As she was about to walk past, I grabbed her wrist. When she turned around in confusion, I leaned over and whispered something into her ear. Her eyes carried some concern once I pulled back to examine her face.

  “Are you sure about this?”

  “It’ll be fine,” I said with a smile.

  At the very least, Enzo wouldn’t hurt her. There’s too many witnesses around who can see the two of them together right now. His life is going to be ruined if he’s forceful. If he was going to do anything bad, it would be through coercion. And that gives us the advantage thanks to our newfound applications of Dream Paralysis.

  She nodded at my words, then walked past me into his dorm room. “I’ll see you in a bit, Tristan.”

  Enzo smiled at me, waving me off then closing the door behind himself.

  It was strange.

  I had condemned her to an uncomfortable one on one with someone like Enzo.

  And yet I felt absolutely nothing about it.

  Of course, it was because I was absolutely confident that I knew how the situation would play out, but…

  It still felt cold and heartless.

  Not just that, it felt like something that Zoey would do.

  “Spirit. Am I being influenced by Zoey’s personality right now?”

  This time, the spirit didn’t respond.

  There was only a vague rumble beneath my feet.