Today was the day. I stared at my reflection as a breeze wound through and I wished it were stronger. The layers and anxiety were the perfect combo to make me sweat.

  My mirror was, unfortunately, painting a very flattering picture of me in my green and gold wedding dress, playing off my dark skin well. Every part of me wanted to rip the dress or smear my makeup. I’d love to even just wipe the bloodred lipstick off to make myself a little less noticeable. But it’d be a cold day in hell before Mom let me look anything but perfect. I had to look beautiful to hide the ugly inside. It was what she always told me. It’s what I needed to believe to make it through the day.

  The knock at the door startled me, and I took a breath to compose myself. “Enter.”

  Dad poked his head in, looking both pitying and excited. Leave it to him to somehow manage both. I supposed after this long married to Mom, he’d have to find a perfect balance somehow. He was smiling, the only good thing about today, as he approached me.

  “Are you excited?”

  “Do you want the real me to answer or the viscount’s daughter to answer? Those are two very different things.”

  He chuckled, sitting next to me on the couch. “I always want the real you.” He took my hand and rubbed his thumb over my knuckles. I was sure it was meant to be soothing, but he only ever did it after the full moon, as if checking there was only human skin on my hand. Today was the only time he did it other than that and it somehow made me feel worse.

  His hands were just as rough as always, despite being a viscount. There was no reason for him to toil away in the gardens, his dark hands growing darker and manicured fingers growing calloused, but he enjoyed the act of working. The lines around his eyes were deep and his greying hair seemed almost white from years in the sun. Still handsome, of course. He would never admit to anything less, and he wouldn’t be wrong.

  “Well,” I sighed. “You could skip a rock off my back with the amount of sweat pooling.” He laughed, snorting and squeezing my hand as he slapped his knee with his other hand. “Other than that, I’m okay. Just the normal amount of anxious about marrying someone I’ve never met.”

  “It’s not so bad,” he said, barely recovering from the laughing fit. “I’d never met your mother before marrying her. It’s been a beautiful twenty-five years since the day.”

  I raised my eyebrow, knowing full well once he had a drop of alcohol in him, he’d spill the beans on how awful Mom was to be with. There was a reason they didn’t share a bedroom, and it wasn’t to set a good example to me and my sisters.

  He shrugged, looking out the window. The sun was almost at its apex, the cool air quickly heating as it climbed higher. Dad stood and extended his hand. “It’s about that time. Are you ready?”

  “To be out of this dress,” I said. “So, I guess that means, yes. Let’s get me married.”

  “Then let’s go.” He stood, holding out his arm. With a stifled sigh, I stood and lopped my arm in his. I glanced back at my room as we passed through the door, my heart clenching. I would never see it again. I wouldn’t have my view of the gardens from my window seat. I wouldn’t have my bed covered in paintings I was working on. I wouldn’t even have the warm weather I was used to from Wisteria. My soon-to-be husband lived too far south for the perpetual warm weather I was used to.

  We passed through the halls of the manor, and I could see myself with my sisters, running away from our governess as she tried to wrangle the three of us into our pajamas. Liza, my oldest sister who took after Mom as she got older, was always the one leading the charge. Whether it was to sneak food we weren’t supposed to have or to make up a plan to sneak out of lessons. Her scheming had gotten better as we got older, and now, as the wife of a viscount two days’ ride from home, she was putting those skills to good use.

  Verdi never wanted to participate. She was always scared of getting caught, but with enough pestering from us, she would always relent and would always be the one to double down the hardest when we were caught. She was still unmarried, spending most of her time in the gardens with Dad. She didn’t help much, but she liked to spend time with him as he was climbing in age. He would never admit it, but while I was his funniest daughter and Liza was his smartest, she was his favorite.

  Mom was waiting for us at the garden entrance. Her hair was done up in an elaborate braided crown with gold hair pins sticking in to hold it in place. She looked calm, serene as she gazed through the window upon the small gathering. The only people attending the wedding would be each side’s immediate family, our servants, and no one else. It was Mom’s request, and my in-laws were happy to oblige.

  Her calm expression changed to harsh disdain as she looked at me, reaching into her dress for a cloth. “You look like a pig with how much you’re sweating.”

  “It’s hot and you insisted I get ready early. Of course, I’m sweating.”

  She turned to Dad as she dabbed my face, trying not to mess up the makeup. “Why didn’t you do anything about this?”

  “I was going to and then I forgot.” He looked properly admonished, but as Mom scoffed and turned back to patting down my face, he winked. He had no intension of telling me to wipe off the sweat. There would be no point as I was just as hot as I had been before.

  She grumbled and sighed, holding out the cloth for one of the servants to take. “I’m going to go out there and in one minute, you better walk down that aisle with all the beauty and grace I taught you.”

  “Hard to forget it.” She pulled one of the gold pins from her hair and put it in mine. She softened for just a moment before schooling her face and walking out the door. I took a breath and looked out the window. On the left side were my sisters, grandparents, and Liza’s husband. On the left side were the Dukes Dain and Ia, my soon-to-be husband’s parents, and his siblings whose names escaped me.

  Dad pushed the doors open, and I stepped out into the light, trying to keep myself together. Dad stood next to me, matching pace as we walked. As we approached the altar, Dad tied a golden ribbon around my wrists and kissed my hands before taking his seat as I stood to face my groom. I had been so focused on making sure I wasn’t squinting that I didn’t see him until we were face to face.

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  Muin was handsome. Long, soft looking black hair pulled into a top knot with a silver hair pin. His jaw was square and sharp, making his features look harsher than they were. He was covered in freckles that sprayed his wide nose and round cheeks with dark dots. His eyes were brown and as he turned them to me, the sunlight hit his tanned face making them glow gold for a moment before a cloud passed in front of the sun.

  The face of my husband. Hopefully a face I could learn to like. Maybe even love.

  He looked at me, taking my dark brown eyes, full mouth, and wide shoulders. His eyes dipped to my bosom for a moment before looking back up. I couldn’t blame him since it was hard to miss, and it was what everyone did once I’d hit twelve. He cocked his head, and said, “You’re tall.”

  “So are you.”

  His smile was small as he looked at the priestess and nodded. She cleared her throat. “We are gathered here today under the light and heat of Solas to witness the union of Hyran Notti and Muin Nin. Today these two people become one under Their gaze and live as one under one roof. If there are any objections to this union, speak now.” I glanced at the people gathered. None of them looked even remotely interested. “Then now, by grace of Solas, I pronounce you Hyran and Muin Nin, Marquis’ of Datura.” She grabbed my ribbon and tied an intricate knot with his blue ribbon. She held up our hands, the knot falling between us as we turned to face our families. There was a polite clap before our hands were dropped.

  We walked down the aisle together, shortening my strides to keep his pace. Years of walking with Dad made my stride far longer than it needed to be, but Dad was a huge man and slowed down for no one but Mom. Despite Muin’s long legs, he seemed determined to mosey.

  I kept my eyes forward, focusing on the door in front of us. All I had to do was walk to it and then my new life would begin. I wouldn’t see my family for some time and that was only if they wanted to visit me at my new home. They probably wouldn’t. Mom wouldn’t go through the hassle after negotiating this marriage just to see me again, and Dad wouldn’t want to listen to Mom complain about either having to come visit me or being left alone for over a month.

  Liza had her own family to think about and Verdi could barely stand the two-hour ride to our cousins. She wouldn’t last the two weeks it took to get to Datura.

  Besides, I thought, looking at the door as it got closer, they finally got rid of the curse. There would be no reason to even think of me again.

  The doors were pulled open by two servants and we wound our way through the manor. My mind wandered as we walked, reminiscing. We passed the hall the led to Mom and Dad’s rooms and I couldn’t have been older than four when I ran there crying, a nightmare waking me up in the middle of the night.

  The double doors to one of the gardens was propped open, letting the air flow. That was where I changed for the first time. Wind ripping past me as I shrunk and changed. It was also where Putra would come to sneak me snacks when I couldn’t leave the house.

  The front door was closer, and I remembered the first time I met our governess, Everlee. She was silhouetted against the sun and larger than life. I clung to Mom’s skirt, hoping I wouldn’t have to be around sun a fearsome woman.

  I held my breath as we crossed the threshold, the sun blinding me before my eyes adjusted. The carriage was packed with my luggage and the Datura guards stood at the ready. No time wasted in kicking me out.

  Once we were out of the door, Muin untied the ribbon from his wrist, and he gave me his end. “I’m going ahead.” He said nothing else as he got onto his horse and started off. It was then I remembered why I knew nothing about him. Muin was a known recluse, moving out to Nin-Datura Manor as soon as he could and not interacting with anyone unless it was necessary. The things I did hear about him weren’t exactly positive either.

  “Well, that wasn’t very husbandly.”

  I turned to see Putra and relaxed for the first time today. Despite being my personal guard, he was slender and short, his round face lighting up in a smile as he bowed in greeting. His soft appearance hid years of training and conditioning that even Dad, who trained him, forgot about sometimes.

  “Our wedding was all of ten minutes and we said maybe less than ten words to each other. I think it was fine all things considered.” At least he didn’t seem pissed off. “I wish you were coming with me. It would make this whole ordeal a little easier.”

  “Oh?” He moved to the side, revealing two bags that I recognized as his. “I thought they told you. I’m moving there with you.”

  “What? I thought Mom said no.”

  He grinned, and he looked as mischievous as he had since we were kids. “I just kindly reminded her of what was to be lost if they knew about you. She was very agreeable after.”

  I laughed. “You menace, Ra. I’m glad you’re coming with me. Especially since all I have are his guards.” They seemed nice enough, strong, and dependable, but if I were seen, especially so soon after the wedding…

  “Of course, my lady.” He bowed again, this time deeper with a flourish of his hands. “I made a promise to be by your side as long as I lived. I intend to keep that promise.”

  I smiled. If there was anyone I could count on, it was Putra. My best friend and best guard. The only guard who stayed when my curse first started to manifest.

  I clapped my hands, excited that I’d be able to strip out of my dress once I was in the carriage. “Let’s get a move on. Maybe if I’m lucky I’ll get a glimpse of my husband when we get there.”