Intern’s Log: I Just Got an Update on the Monsters Coming for Us—From My First Hookup.
Date: [I Want to Die]
Intern ID: Reynolds, J. (This might be worse than the apocalypse itself.)
So.
I was expecting an update.
? The Good Boys felt something moving in the dark.
? **Zil-Vatek warned that something was watching. **
? The Galactic Council refuses to acknowledge the threat.
? We have uplifted species, and that might be why they’ve noticed us.
? The world is on the edge of something very, very bad.
But what I was not expecting—
What I could have never predicted—
Was that the warning would come from my first hookup.
My first-ever, deeply awkward, bad-decision-of-my-youth, please-let-us-never-speak-of-this-again hookup.
Because, apparently?
She is involved in all of this.
And I?
I am not ready for this conversation.
Phase One: The Call I Was Not Prepared For
I was at my desk, trying to recover from my wedding, when my private line rang.
The secure line.
The one only a handful of people should have access to.
So, obviously, I answered.
"Reynolds."
Silence.
Then—
"Wow. Never thought I’d hear your voice again."
I froze.
Because I knew that voice.
Too well.
"Oh. Oh no."
She laughed.
"Oh, yes."
I leaned back in my chair, already regretting my life.
"What do you want?"
"Oh, nothing much."
A pause.
"Just thought you should know—your monsters? They’re already here."
Oh. Oh, no.
Phase Two: The Woman Who Should Not Be Here
Let me be clear.
This woman—this particular person—
Was not supposed to be in my life anymore.
She was supposed to be a footnote.
A bad decision made in a moment of reckless youth.
? We hooked up once.
? It was wildly ill-advised.
? We parted ways under mutual “Let’s never acknowledge this again” terms.
? And now, years later, she is telling me the world is already under attack.
I rubbed my face.
"How do you know about this?"
She laughed again.
"Reynolds, sweetheart. I work for them."
I felt my soul leave my body.
Phase Three: What She Told Me (And Why It’s Worse Than I Thought)
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
"Okay. Okay. Just—explain."
"The monsters? The ones watching? The ones you think are coming?"
"Yeah?"
"They never left."
I felt physically ill.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, they’ve been here this entire time. Hiding. Waiting. Adjusting."
"Adjusting to what?"
She paused.
Then, in a flat, calm voice, she said—
"To us."
I did not like that answer.
Phase Four: The Implications That Ruined My Day
? The monsters aren’t arriving.
? They’re already here.
? They are adapting to human civilization.
? They are learning from us.
? They are waiting for something.
I took a deep breath.
"How long?"
"Long enough."
"How many?"
She hesitated.
"That’s the problem."
"What do you mean?"
"We don’t know where they end and we begin anymore."
I felt my stomach drop.
Phase Five: The Realization That Broke Me
"So what? They’re… disguising themselves?"
"Not disguising."
"Then what?"
She took a breath.
"Some of them were never disguises, Reynolds."
Silence.
Long.
Heavy.
"You’re saying some of them were always human."
"No. I’m saying some of them were never human to begin with."
I sat back.
Mind reeling.
Because that?
That changes everything.
Phase Six: The One Question I Should Have Asked First
"Why are you telling me this?"
She paused.
Then she said,
"Because you’re the only one they’re afraid of."
I blinked.
"WHAT? WHY?!"
"Think about it, sweetheart. The bears. The raccoons. The Good Boys. The lemurs. The aliens. Every major non-human intelligence on this planet?"
"Yeah?"
"They trust you."
I swallowed.
"And that scares them?"
"No, sweetheart."
"It terrifies them."
Phase Seven: The Call Ends, and I Need a Drink
"So what do I do?" I asked.
"That’s up to you."
"Great. Thanks. Very helpful."
She chuckled.
"Oh, and Reynolds?"
"What."
"Tell Evelyn I say hi."
And then she hung up.
Leaving me sitting there, staring at the wall.
Trying to process the fact that the monsters aren’t just here.
They’ve always been here.
And now I have to figure out what the hell I’m supposed to do about it.
Final Thoughts (I Need Therapy, But There’s No Time for That)
? The monsters aren’t arriving.
? They never left.
? They are watching, waiting, and adapting.
? They are afraid of me. (Which is the most horrifying thing of all.)
? My first hookup is somehow involved in all of this. (Which is also horrifying.)
I don’t know what happens next.
But I do know this—
If they’re afraid of me, that means I still have time to act.
And I intend to use it.
End Log.
