AHAHA- Ahem. Excuse me. Ignore that. Where was I? Oh yeah. Laughing. No! I mean with the story! Right....just uhhh....pretend these words up here are just some kind of forgotten note that wasn't removed. Continue on. Remember though, I never fool around, so that was probably the only laugh you'll ever get from me.
Every hero story begins with some guy, probably getting beat up, with us wondering why this is so. Or not, because it happens a lot. Like how we started with our dear young protagonist, who's name we will forget as soon as we change stories, because who cares about the protagonist's name?
Well, this protagonist just got finished getting his money stolen by some dudes. What dudes you ask? Those dudes. Who doesn't call those thugs who just gave you their weird names as those dudes in their head? But that is of little importance. We are talking about protagonists. Some of them fight back, some of them pay money, and some, like ours, just gets stabbed. Like stabbed so badly we just start laughing. Like laughing hard. Like, we can hardly restrain my laughter because he was such a sucky protagonist. We don't care if our dear protagonist is dying, we all know plot armor will save him. He will then rise up with burning passion to rid the world of evil. It happens every time. No way that any protagonist of any story can be killed from a common street thug, like, look at ours! He is still there, brea- wait.
Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
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Is he...still alive? Yeah, he has to. No common street thug... But why is he not moving at all?
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The plot armor isn't working. But it has to! Never has this happened to me before. I mean, sure, it's my first time narrating and all, but there's no way this could have happened. Oh, I know! He will return as a zombie, some reincarnated person, or begin in the afterlife. Yeah! That has to be it! But where is his soul?
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Not here.
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Not there.
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...It's nowhere.
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...I think this means I don't have a protagonist anymore.
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WHAT KIND OF STORY HAS NO PROTAGONIST!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
