Radosh

  As I wait for the spectacle to start, I remember something I completely forgot, distracted by the multitude of thoughts and ideas from the st level up.

  What is it that I forgot? It’s none other than level eight’s level-up rewards!

  “I’m sure I have time to check it before the show starts. Let’s see…” It doesn’t take long for me to find the information I’m looking for. “Aha, aha…”

  Other than the usual cp bonus and stasis chambers, both normal and giant-sized ones, there were two new things. Well, one new thing and an upgrade. The upgrade is easy to understand, which is raising the number of bosses I can deploy to three.

  “Three bosses! How could I forget about this!?”

  I’m tempted to start smming my head on the table as self-inflicted punishment but stop myself before doing it. I’m not inside the game, and it’d hurt if I were to do it.

  It’s a third boss, for fuck’s sake!

  Here I was, wasting brain energy thinking how to upgrade the rest of my monsters so that my dungeon better fits my current level, while pnning the next dungeon area… But I forgot the most important detail!

  I would have already started a new area if I had known! A new area with a new boss! Or I could have upgraded the Hydra Mantrap into an actual Boss instead of a pseudo-boss…

  “... no, not that. I’d have to go capture the units to create it for a second time if I wanted to make it a Boss.” There’s no ‘upgrade to boss’ option in this game, after all. You have to create a monster as a Boss from the start. “I’m too zy for that, that’s a no.”

  When the level-up message popped up I was too focused on the Mystery Event that was about to start… I regret it so much…!

  To distract myself from my past mistakes, I pay attention to level eight’s unlock. The ‘new unlock’ isn’t nearly as exciting as the increased boss limit, though it is reted. It’s ‘Composite Bosses’.

  “Composite Bosses… what were they…? Ah, yes, they must be that thing!”

  There are plenty of examples in games and books where there isn’t a single monster acting as a boss, but there are instead two or more. Composite Bosses are more or less the same.

  That time I fought four elementals stacked on top of each other, acting like they were a totem that combined and split during the fight, using their innate skills to complement each other and torment me…

  Well, that was a Composite Boss.

  Now that I think about it, I don’t remember fighting any other Composite Boss, which is kind of weird because there are tons of pyers who create boss pairs or trios for their dungeons.

  “Maybe I did but I forgot…? Well, who cares?”

  If I don’t remember, it’s because they were either too me or too boring. Or both. I wouldn’t rule out the possibility of them being so weak I didn’t realize they were Bosses, either.

  Don’t ask me why, but I’ve seen pyers use basic units like Goblins as bosses…

  Those ‘bosses’ are so pathetic that after the Boss’ buff is applied, they still have lower stats than a typical level-one Champion. For me, those aren’t Bosses, even if they have the ‘Boss’ bel.

  Anyway, let’s return to the topic.

  Composite Bosses are interesting because they share the skill points and Boss’ buff that doubles all stats. This makes Composite Bosses strong, but each monster has fewer skills than a traditional single Boss.

  It’s a trade-off between individual synergy, since multiple skills acting together usually make you more powerful, for sheer raw stats.

  Which one is better? It depends on what you want. But I wouldn’t suggest you use more than four or five units for a Composite Boss or the skill points will get so diluted they might as well have the same power level as normal enemies.

  “So yeah, there’s that.”

  I don’t care much about Composite Bosses. I might or might not use them, depending on what I want for my dungeon when the time comes. What I do care about is that I completely forgot about the third boss!

  “Did my brain rot!? How could I forget!? What’s more, how could I not realize there’s a 2/3 next to my dungeon’s Boss count!?”

  *Sm! Sm!* I start smming my head on the table.

  …I know I said I wouldn’t do it, but the temptation is too high… I’m sorry, brain. I owe you an apology.

  “Ouch, shit! It’s starting to hurt…!” I suddenly stop and stand up. “Alright. Time to go find some popcorn…”

  And this time, it’s for real. The popcorn, I mean. I’ll eat them while watching my special guest do his thing.

  “Green Gang!”

  ““Green Gang!””

  “Is this how you shout? I didn’t hear you. Come on, once more! GREEN GANG!”

  ““GREEN GANG!””

  Their shout this time is somewhat passable. Tsk, kids these days… They don’t even know how to pump themselves up.

  “Alright, that’s better. Let’s go, punks! I’ll supervise you and show you how to do this, huh, huh, huh!”

  As usual, I start kissing my biceps. It’s my good luck ritual. The worst situations, like meeting the Evil Mastermind himself, always happen when I forget to do it, so after many failures, I’ve learned to never forget it.

  I observe the three pyers in front of me. This time, it’s three orcs. It isn’t weird, as most pyers who choose our faction, the best faction of them all, want to csh with enemies in melee. Or py as an orc hunter or ranger.

  The weird ones are those who py goblins. Like, uh… what was his name? Bah, it doesn’t matter.

  That guy who’s always following me is one of the unusual ones. Though, if I had to say, I’d rather bring him with me than those who can’t follow my orders and get themselves killed, dragging me into their mess.

  I’ve banished more than one of those, and personally sin the others during the invasions.

  But this time, things are different. This new batch of pyers is indispensable for today’s infallible pn. The infallible pn of using them as sacrificial pawns, while pretending to care for them and teaching them how to survive.

  The st time I tried this, it didn’t work as intended, but this time it’ll be different. I’ve checked there wasn’t a single mention of new monsters or traps in the forums before coming. There won’t be any surprises unless the change was done less than half an hour ago.

  …I can’t be that unlucky, can I?

  This time I’ll keep myself to the easiest and simplest route, one that will guarantee our success! This is why I needed to bring the greenhorns with me, to have an excuse to follow the ‘easy’ path while keeping my honor and reputation. I couldn’t bring my usual team in this situation. They’d suspect me if I used the easiest and safest route I’ve found after uncountable failures.

  Furthermore, the greenhorns will serve as a shield against any surprises. If they happen to trigger something I don’t know, I’ll just pretend I did but didn’t warn them because they need to learn.

  I’ll use them when I need to, and take the glory and honor of easily clearing the dungeon for myself.

  “Huh, huh, huh!” My guttural ughter fills the silence permeating the forest. “You’ll introduce yourselves as we walk. Follow my orders, and you’ll survive. And remember: don’t touch anything unless I say so. Let’s go, Green Gang!”

  ““GREEN GANG!””

  They’re starting to learn, it seems.

  Today’s the day I clear this damned dungeon without any problems and recover my lost orc pride once and for all! There’s nothing that can go wrong! I’ve got everything covered, huh, huh, huh!

  The first signs of incompetence start to show as soon as we go somewhat deep into the first zone.

  “What the fuck are you doing!? Don’t you know how to move during a battle!?”

  As soon as they’re attacked from two sides, the fools panic and start fumbling around. I have to step up to give them orders. “You and you, deal with the turtle. And you, the one with the bow,” I smack him on the head, “there’s another Goblimp there. Quickly deal with it!”

  “Y-yes, sir!”

  Tsk! To struggle so much against those monsters… What would they do if the Mad Rat decided to show up? I’m sure they’d piss their pants and run to their moms, scarred for the rest of their lives.

  I watch as the fools deal with the two enemies when something hits me from the back. It’s another Goblimp.

  *Hihihi!*

  “I swear, one day I’m going to exterminate them all…” I’ll bring my usual crew and do a dungeon sweep, making sure to kill them all. Even if it’s the st thing I do, I’ll make sure to achieve it one day!

  Oh how much I wish there was an option to ban an enemy from spawning… But today isn’t that day.

  “What are you doing!? Didn’t you see there’s another one there? Stop wasting time and quickly kill it!”

  The orc, startled by another smack on his head, points his bow at the Goblimp that attacked me. The Goblimp hides behind the rock, and a new hide-and-seek battle follows.

  “Huh, huh, huh. Yeah… you deal with them…” I say, low enough so they can’t hear me.

  It feels good to have ckeys who do your work for you. From now on, I should always bring someone to deal with those annoying pests.

  After the two melee guys finish the turtle and the ranged one kills the Goblimps, I guide them toward the tunnels. We must escape before the other turtles congregate in our position. I’ve come here so many times that I can avoid the mushrooms almost as if it were an instinct, so we clear that zone quickly too, and find ourselves in the boratory.

  I push the three bastards inside the room and block the exit with my body. Not a single slimy boy will slip past me, huh, huh, huh!

  “Go on,” I urge them, “deal with this yourselves.”

  “Won’t you give us any pointers?” Asks one of the melee pyers.

  “Why would I?” One’s character is forged by life-and-death situations! By real battle! If there’s no risk of dying, it isn’t worth the time and effort! “This is a straight fight without gimmicks, so go and fight like a true warrior! Or are you scared?”

  “N-no, sir!”

  “I thought so,” I say, nodding.

  The battle that follows is a terrible mess.

  One of the melee pyers starts chasing the slimy bastards around the room while ignoring everything else. The lighting rods bst him with electricity as he runs around, but he prioritizes killing the monsters.

  The other two don’t do much better. The b-coat guy is hard to kill and when the first ice nova appears, the ranger gets caught in it and almost dies in the following attacks.

  “Why can’t you work together!?” I shout, kindly instructing them, “Stop acting like you’re alone and help each other! You! Stop chasing weaklings and fight the strong guy! If the enemy runs away, you should focus on those enemies you can reach. And you, stay out of range if you’re weak to damage! And can anyone tell me why the fuck you didn’t kill the lighting rods first!? They’re the most annoying and easy target!”

  My support mobs are better than them at working together... Pyers should be better than this.

  Following my instructions, they start coordinating their moves a bit better. They kill the lightning traps, the battle against the b-coat guy gets easier, and the second ice nova only hits the melee pyers. The b-coat guy falls and the running spitters fall right after.

  When the battle ends, I commend them by smacking them on their heads. That’s the most orcish way to learn, huh, huh, huh!

  “Learn from this and don’t repeat those stupid mistakes, understood?”

  They nod, not daring to look me in the eye. “Alright, let’s go. Another battle like this one awaits us. Green Gang!”

  ““GREEN GANG!””

  Although two of the bastards almost died in the fight against the second b-coat guy, their teampy was considerably better in the second one. After that, we open the door to the next room and step inside.

  “Stay behind me, and don’t fuck around,” I order.

  “B-but… didn’t you say we’ll do everything… never mind.”

  My intense gre makes the hunter shut up mid-phrase. Still, I continue expining.

  “This isn’t a fight you can win, so I’ll take charge while we’re here.”

  From what I’ve seen, they aren’t good enough to deal with the Boss that inhabits this pce. Even if they were, I’d do the same.

  “Huh, huh, huh…! Here comes the fight I was looking forward to!”

  This is my fight. I’ve been waiting for this since we entered the dungeon. It’s one of the few fights I can fully enjoy in this damned dungeon, so I won’t give it to anyone, even if they’re my students!

  “Are you watching, Evil Mastermind?” I say, looking high into the air. “I hope you are because I’m going to crush your little toy! Huh, huh, huh!”

  The time has come to show why I am the boss.

  “As real as DMA feels, it is still a game. Pyers will take it as such and there’s little you can do against it. You shouldn’t expect them to know how to fight and use weapons properly, or even worse, expect them to use proper tactics and coordinate during a battle. Consider yourself lucky if they don’t kill themselves or target their allies with their skills.”

  - From an unknown source.