Another boring NERV meeting, another boring change to the boring procedures.
"Ugh"
Stupid 'emergency meeting' could've been a goddamned email...
After the juicy gossip scoop from earlier, none of this could hold Misato’s attention as she wondered what Ritsuko had pnned ter on. She promised a secondary “surprise meeting” that would be way more interesting. It was tempting to feign a sore stomach or something to get out of the stuffy conference room, but she would just be waiting on Ritsuko to finish her own meetings anyway. So she stayed, and endured. Paying as much attention to the most important details as she could, which is to say, not much.
“Geez, well you certainly know what to say to make a girl look forward to something.”
Misato walked into Ritsuko’s office, not noticing the three small figures sitting to the right. Turning and leaning on Ritsuko’s desk, she accidentally gave quite a face-full to an already anxious young man, earning a gre from Asuka.
“So what’s up? Why all the hush-hush?”
Dr. Akagi cleared her throat and silently gestured behind Misato. She turned, and, seeing Shinji, was still either oblivious to, or simply didn’t care about, her borderline waterboarding of the boy.
“Woah, hey guys, weird to see you four hangin’ out. Sorry, let me take a seat, too.”
The only empty seat was on the far end of the room. She sat, just a little jealous that she had to sit furthest away from Shinji.
Ritsuko eyed each of the girls before her gaze fell on the mastermind of the meeting.
“Okay, Shinji, we’re all here. What was it you wanted to talk about?”
“…”
Looking to Asuka for strength, she simply stared in return. She, too, had no idea what this meeting was really covering.
Taking deep breaths, he began slowly.
“I have learned a great deal from my time trapped in the LCL. Things that startled me, sometimes upset me, and things I may not have ever needed to learn… Most, though, seem very important to our future, and in our coming battles. Hence…”
He gestured vaguely around the room.
They were listening intently. Now wearing heavier expressions at the weight of the topic.
“When I regained consciousness inside the LCL, I started talking to another entity. This entity told me secrets that I couldn’t possibly have known, nor learned in my entire lifetime. So far, everything I learned about, up to current events, has been proven true, or at least pusible for what I can’t prove.”
Ritsuko’s eyes widened as Misato’s narrowed.
“You experienced auditory hallucinations inside the LCL?”
Ritsuko began jotting down notes at lightning speed, never taking her eyes off Shinji.
“No. I had no physical sensory faculties at the time. It was communicating entirely through the mental bond of myself and the EVA, of that I’m very certain.”
Her scratching slowed, but did not stop.
“Fascinating.”
Ritsuko offered
“Scary.”
Misato countered.
Taking more deep breaths, Shinji further organized his thoughts.
“To give a decent understanding of exactly what it is I learned, I’ll start from the chronological beginning. All the way back to the first impact.”
“Ssssoooo… Lilith is the angel we have downstairs, not Adam?”
Misato was having trouble modifying what she thought she already knew.
“Right. Adam was in the south pole, until the contact experiment reduced his form to an embryo. Lilith maintained her form ever since the first impact, and has been lying below central dogma for the entire history of life on Earth.”
Ritsuko had long since stopped trying to ask Shinji why he thought he knew such 'scandalous lies'. It was far too obvious he knew so much more than should be possible. He would see through any trick she could throw at him, so she didn’t bother. It was important to note, too, how much smarter he seemed. Not only more confident, but more careful with his words. More *skilled* with his words, too.
Shinji had told the history of EVA, the angels, and the impacts as best as he could, as if listing off bullet points…
…First Impact, lilith’s seed of knowledge spills into the ocean, creating the LCL sea of primordial soup…
…Adam is impaled on the Spear of Longinus so as to not release his seed of power…
…Second Impact, humans mess with something they couldn’t possibly understand, awaken Adam, release the seed of power, birthing the angels…
…NERV and SEELE both work together and compete as necessary to achieve their simir, yet individual goals of Human Instrumentality…
…The EVA’s are built from the bodies of Lilith and Adam…
…The angels are successfully fought off with the death of Kaworu…
…Humanity devours itself like a snake eating its own tail….
…Third Impact, Human Instrumentality begins with every soul being dislocated…
…The world ends. We all die…
…
The level of world-shifting events id before the girls was staggering to say the least.
“Most of that is actually on record, so I can personally substantiate the general timeline he gave.”
Ritsuko spoke up to ease the tension in the room.
“It’s way too obvious he got this from a semi-reliable source, so I won’t even pretend to cover it up here.”
“You knew about all this?”
Misato wasn’t sure how to feel, but the strongest emotion she felt at this moment was one of betrayal.
“No, but some of it is common knowledge among the more elite members of NERV, not to mention SEELE…
How Shinji discovered it, though…
That’s new…”
“You BITCH! Don’t just gloss over it like it’s nothing! What the hell is wrong with you? With the commander, with SEELE, with… EVERYONE!?”
Ritsuko didn’t know what to say, so she didn’t speak.
“Is this…"
Misato was slumped in her seat.
"…
…what my father died for?”
More silence.
Misato stood up, walked over, hugged Shinji tightly, then stormed out of the room.
…
“Go on, Shinji. If we’ve gone this far with revealing such dangerous secrets to every current EVA pilot. The commander won’t like it if he finds out, but we may as well be working at full capacity. Now, what do you think was the entity that shared this with you?”
“…I really don’t know, but my gut reaction is to say it was Lilith.”
“Lilith? Not the EVA itself? Not Y-
…”
“Miss Ritsuko?”
“You didn’t… mention that part. I don’t know if you were told. What happened… To your mother…”
“…
…Yes…”
“…”
“…She… Became one with the EVA… With Unit-01…
Just like I did…
…Only she didn’t come back…”
The look on Asuka’s face was horrible. He knew it would only get worse, but he turned to face her and Rei and forced himself to continue.
“That’s the secret to the neural connection. The EVA’s are sentient, but not on their own. Alone, they’re nothing but bodies in a metal shell. No soul, no life, no thought. A homunculus.
But with a soul, they have life. They have thoughts.
...
So for an EVA to function, the pilot must be tightly bound to the soul within it. This is most effectively achieved by the selected soul being the pilot’s mother.”
Shinji couldn’t look at Asuka as he spoke, so he stared at the floor before turning his head back up and looking past her toward Rei.
“That brings me to the reason I wanted to have this whole talk in the first pce.”
“I am ready to hear what you have to say, Shinji.”
Rei’s submissive nature was disturbing now that Shinji knew what she was designed to be.
“You, Rei, don’t have a mother with whom the EVA can be infused. That’s why, despite being so well trained, and so ser-focused, you have trouble controlling the prototype Unit-00.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Rei… You… weren’t born… like a person…
You were made, artificially. By my father.”
“I… understand.”
“…
...Rei… Are… are you okay? This is a big deal, this is-”
Time seemed to stop as Rei, in one clean motion, stood up, stepped forward, bent down, and pressed her lips into Shinji’s.
The moment he perceived what was happening, he backed away and pushed her face away. More roughly than he meant.
“I don’t mind.”
Rei spoke in a monotone, emotionless voice.
She had stopped speaking like that for some time. Why is she back to-
Oh. Of course. This is too much for her.
What? Wait. What does she mean by ‘I don’t mind’? Mind what?
“Wha- huh?”
“I don’t mind. I am Rei, and always have been, and always will be. That hasn’t changed and will not, regardless of the method of my birth.
And I don’t care that I was made by your father. It does not change my kiss”
Is she… Saying what I think she’s saying? She wants to… be with me?
“Well, Shinji? Are you denying me?”
It didn’t take a doctorate to understand she was on the verge of mental colpse. Of all the actions he could take, rejecting her outright was out of the question right now. He had to be vague.
“I-…
…I can’t…”
“Can’t deny me?”
“Nor accept your offer…
...This… isn’t a ‘no’, Rei…
This is a ‘not now’. There’s too much going on constantly. I can’t take your offer yet. I’m sorry.”
“…”
“…”
“I understand.”
Rei walked out of the room.
Asuka stood up. Shinji turned to look, but was met with a fist to his cheek, sending him to the ground. Frightened, he looked up at her to see her sobbing, standing over him.
“What, so you’re gonna be fucking your sister now?
“I-”
“Gross little pervert.”
And she ran off as well.
Only Ristuko stayed. Dabbing his cheek with a mild numbing agent. It tingled. It was uncomfortable. He would have preferred to just let it rest. He wished she hadn’t decided to help him. He was hurt and wanted to go home.
But home isn’t an option right now, is it?
“You really fucked the pooch, didn’t you?”
Shinji didn’t have the energy to be shocked at her casual swearing. He supposed he hadn’t known her long enough to actually tell if it was out of character for her.
“Why didn’t you reject Rei? What Asuka said was out of line, but still holds weight. Rei is technically like a sister to you. She was made with a modified form of Yui’s DNA. More than enough simirity for any normal person to consider it a sufficient reason to cut off any romantic ties whatsoever. And judging by her fury, Asuka seems to have opened up to you a lot more. Intimately, too, if I dare say so.”
“I… Was afraid of hurting her.”
“So you did it for her, and not for you?”
“…”
“Ah… Even worse, it was for both, huh?”
Shinji shamefully nodded.
“Disgustingly, even I’m not sure how much was for her sake, and how much for mine.”
“Mostly for hers, I can tell. For what little comfort that gives you.”
“…”
“So, did you get what you wanted?”
“...Huh?”
“Out of this little boondoggle? Did it do everything for you that you wanted?”
“…
I think… Weirdly enough…
It did.”
Ritsuko smiled at him. Such a warm smile. He had never considered her to be motherly, but at this moment, he felt so comfortable in her care.
“I’m so gd. In the field of Science, we always get what we want even when things go terribly wrong. To fail means to learn. I know the feeling well. You accomplished what you wanted, even though it hurt. I hope you get even more than you hoped for.”
“T-Thanks… Miss Ristuko.”
“Ah, just Ristuko is fine, Shinji. I’m not so uptight as I’ve presented myself in the past. Considering everything we’ve discussed today, I’m pretty sure I could stand to be a bit more friendly from time to time.”
Shinji began blushing, but he wasn’t sure why. Why was he so happy? Was he just relieved to get this all off his chest? Was it because she accepted the truths he told and didn’t hate him for it?
When Ritsuko finished packing up her miniature first aid kit, she pced it back in her desk before turning back, and gave Shinji a kiss on the cheek. The same cheek that Asuka had hit. It didn’t tingle. He was comfortable. It didn’t hurt anymore. He preferred this over letting it rest. He was so gd she decided to help him. He was ready to go home.
He wanted to heal them the way she healed him.
“Goodbye, Ritsuko. I’m going to salvage what I can from this.
“Good luck...
...
...Do your best.”
