Have you ever found yourself daydreaming about random things while sitting in class? Yeah, most people do. I'm not a philosopher or whatever, but I have come to call this phenomenon "The Great Escape".
"Why?" you may wonder, or maybe not, well, because that's what it really is. An escape from our reality, letting our minds wander off into the vastness of our desires, our dreams, and our wishes. I wish I had money, I wish I had no worries, I wish I was some badass ex-spec ops soldier who just happens to be sitting in class and then some shit pops off.
You know, stupid shit like that. You find yourself immersed in your imagination as you drive away from the cops doing 190 miles per hour on a modified GTR or an S1K, or doing some crazy shit as the world watches, that main character syndrome we all have as we wander off in our minds.
Or maybe you think of other things. Maybe of getting with all the women you could ever imagine and have some harem showing your weakness to commitment with one woman and how weak you are to your sexual desires.....your weakness disgusts me. Hopefully, you're normal, like me, and find yourself daydreaming of that one beautiful woman you met, and she's just been on your mind ever since, but you lack the balls to ask her out or just don't know how to approach her.
But hey, that's just life, don't judge me, if only you knew just how beautiful this girl is, you would- "Aspen!" I'm snapped back to reality as I hear my professor pretty much scream my name.
'Yeah, you heard that right, fucking Aspen, named after a fucking city in Colorado, laugh all you want you fucks, I may be monologuing to myself but you're probably on some novel site reading about my story, MY STORY, so fuck you!'
"Hey, Aspen, are you alright, man? I noticed you spaced off pretty much throughout my entire lecture. Is there something on your mind you want to talk about? And not as a professor, but your friend." I looked around and noticed that the room was empty, everyone had already left, and it was only us 2 in the classroom. I know some of you may be shocked to find out that both college and grad school students can have a pretty cordial and friendly relationship with their professors.
"Hey Max," I start, preparing myself to spew some bullshit, "Yeah man, I'm alright, just had a lot on my mind recently. Having second thoughts on Architecture and I'm debating on leaving it for later and getting my master's in Aerospace instead. I also had a late night last night, so I'm sorry about today's class."
Max looks at me with understanding and nods his head as he replies: "Nah, it's all cool, man, trust me, I've been in your shoes a few years back, not knowing what to do. Plus, there's also the fact that being here is pretty expensive. What's your debt going to be? Like $290,000 for a master's in a degree that, if I'm going to be honest, has shit pay?"
"Yup," I run my hand across my face, and with a defeated sigh, I just slump my body even more in my chair. I started with some bullshit and now I have actually started contemplating on whether or not I want to stay on the path of architecture. "I honestly don't even know why I'm doing this. Fucking Aerospace engineering and architecture. The two go hand in hand like Krispy Kreme Donuts and Oyster soup. However," I use my pencil and point at him, "you are my boss and pay me really well."
Max chuckles as he stands up and clasps my shoulders with his hands as his 6'5 frame leans on me (that's about 195cm for you non-freedom unit heathens). "Well, apart from money not being an issue, you do sound like you need a drink. It's Friday and I don't have any more classes to teach today. Also, Rachel took Claire to her parents' for the weekend, so I'm free if there's anything you want to talk about or need to get off your chest."
"I'll take you up on that," I say as I stand up, my figure towering over Max as my 6 foot 11- yeah, who am I kidding, I'm 6 foot on the dot. "You mind if I catch a ride with you? I'm just going to grab an Uber home afterward."
"Sure thing."
Max and I made our way to his pick-up truck, a beautiful and sleek midnight purple 2024 Silverado 3500 HD High Country that was decked out to the teeth.
"This shit is so nice, and it just gets better every time I see it. Though you ain't even beating a Prius in this shit, just too big, too heavy, too slow," I say as a smirk starts to creep its way onto my face.
Max chuckles and gives me a little shove. "The perks of being a professor, which includes canceling your student loans among other things. Pair that up with having such a gifted young man working for your firm, and the rest is history. Also, I'm pretty sure you can get something just as nice with your salary, which I pay. As for beating a prius, you can go fuck yourself."
We just laughed as we got in his truck and sang along to my playlist, which is composed of sad love songs, on the way to his house.
"That's about the most sus shit you've ever done, play some romantic shit while we, two men, alone in a truck, drove through a forest," Max said as we hopped out of his truck and made our way to his house.
"You sang along as well, so I don't wanna hear that shit," I responded in the midst of chuckles.
"Yeah, well, those were some good ass songs." He admitted, "Send that playlist over, I know Rachel will love it."
"You got it, bossman!" I took my phone out of my pocket and was getting ready to send Max the link to my playlist when suddenly, I got a text message from my friend.
Ernesto: Hey man, so I was talking to Autumn, and you know, since she's known Kat and I for so long, she trusts us.
Me: Wait, Autumn? As in the girl I can't get out of my mind, Autumn?
Ernesto: Yup. That same one. Basically, she let slip that she was interested in someone at our church while she was talking to Kat.
Me: Oh damn. Welp, there goes that dream.
Ernesto: Not too fast, bucko.
Ernesto: Kat dug a little bit and came to find out that you caught her fancy, but didn't know how to approach you. She thinks you're out of her league.
Me: Well, that's one oxymoron if I've ever seen one. It's definitely the other way around, she's out of my league.
Ernesto: I'm telling you bro, you're a handsome dude, stop doubting yourself so much.
Ernesto: Anyways, I told her that you had confessed to me that you were "mesmerized", your words, not mine, by her when you first saw her and that I'd be willing to reach out to you to set up a date or a meeting for your two to get to know each other.
Me: My brother in Christ, wingman of the millennia, I love you bro. I'm free this entire weekend, but it'd be better if we could arrange something for tomorrow or maybe after Church on Sunday.
Ernesto: She said Sunday after church would work best for her.
Me: Great, I'll see her then. Man, you don't know how much I love you right now bro.
Ernesto: Aye yo? XD I love you too man, see you Sunday.
Me: See you Sunday.
"What's got you smiling like that? It's like your mood did a complete one-eighty," Max said as he entered the room with a bottle of Scotch and 2 shot glasses in his hands.
"I hadn't told you this, well I hadn't told pretty much anyone, but I'm head over heels for this one girl from my church, she's gorgeous, man, about 5'8, brunette with curly hair and-"
"Wait….you....go to church? You?" Max interrupted me mid-sentence to call out the least important part of the sentence I was talking about.
"Yeah, I go to church, what's so weird about that? I was raised in a Catholic Orphanage, and I'm now working to build an actual relationship with God." I respond back with a chuckle.
"But," He paused for a second as he poured us both a shot, "You're drinking. And Christ on a bike, you curse so much you would make Blackbeard blush if he ever heard you."
"Well, there's nothing wrong with drinking. Even Jesus drank wine, almost exclusively. The problem lies with getting shitfaced." I paused for a second as I raised my glass towards him and downed it. "Something I've never done. Or get drunk in general, I've never gotten past the point where I can't stand up or see straight, let alone slur my speech."
"What about the cursing part?" He asks and pauses before downing his shot. "Pretty sure the Bible says something about that somewhere in it."
"Yeah, I'm like Isaiah, my filthy mouth is a major problem I have been trying to change. I've actually made progress, believe it or not," I say as I play around with the shot glass in my hand.
"So, back to the main topic of discussion, this girl you were talking about." He started pouring himself another shot and motioned towards me and I handed him my glass for him to pour me another shot.
You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.
"Yeah, Autumn, man, she's great. I have never seen a woman as beautiful as her," I said, then quickly remembered to add "no offense."
"None taken, rather happy you don't have your eyes on my wife." He said with a smile as he handed me back my glass.
"When I first saw her at church, I was just awestruck. Kind of what kickstarted my return to God, honestly," I paused and only drank half of my shot this time, "just felt like I wasn't clean or worthy of her."
"And what do you think now?" Max asked me, as he poured himself his 3rd shot.
"I still think I'm not worthy of her, like I'm a stain, you know?" I finished my shot and looked over at Max.
"I know just the feeling," he seemed to stare off, reminiscence painted all over his face, "want another shot?"
"No thanks, not getting shitfaced, remember?" I respond.
"Your loss," he quips, downing his third shot and pouring himself a 4th one.
"Man, a friend hit me up and pretty much told me that she likes me too, and now I have a date for either Sunday afternoon or night."
"Congrats, hope you end up like me, a house, nice truck, a kid--"
"And a functioning alcoholic? No thanks, but I get what you meant," I said as I interrupted him, a smirk plastered across my face.
"Fair enough…"
We just kept on talking until it was about 11 pm, the class had finished at 5 pm, and we got to his place at 6 pm, so that means that we spent the last 4 hours having deep talks, well, for me at least. Max was getting shitfaced and by the time I left, he was already knocked out. He's gonna have one hell of a headache tomorrow.
"Well, this will be an expensive Uber ride home," I said as I looked at the 1-and-a-half-hour Uber ride back home that would cost me about $200.
---
After I got back to my apartment, which was overly expensive for no other reason than the fact that it was in New York City, I took a shower and decided to watch some YouTube before going to sleep. It was 12:30 AM by now and I spent another hour or 2 watching YouTube before I switched over to Instagram.
After opening the app, the first post on my feed was a picture of Autumn with a group of friends, some of whom I was acquainted with, others I was friends with, and some I didn't know at all. I smiled seeing this and immediately hit like on the picture, no longer worrying about what her reaction would be if I gave her posts a like.
"This must be a sign from God," I muttered to myself, smiling even wider. I have no work tomorrow or Sunday, the perks of working in your professor/friend's firm. I spent another 30 minutes or so scrolling through the endless reels that pop up in your feed when you're alone at 3 AM.
"She will never-"
*Swipe*
"Just Do it-"
*Swipe*
"Are you seriously watching porn-"
*Swipe*
"This video is for a young man in his 20s, and let me tell you, God is-"
*Swipe*
"*Screeeech* *Boom* *Beep Beep Beep* Welp, that's another family dead on IG reels, nothing new."
I feel a hint of guilt and scroll back up to the previous reel that was talking about God.
"This video is for a young man in his 20s, and let me tell you, God is reaching out to you. You feel burned out, like this world has nothing to offer you. You've drunk but have never gotten drunk, you've lusted, you've fornicated, you've tried the pleasures of the world, and you still feel empty. You are in love with a woman you haven't had a full conversation with, and feel like you're too dirty for her because she is a woman of God. You feel unworthy."
I feel a bitter smile coming across my face as everything this guy is saying is like a jab at my heart.
"Well, I'm here to tell you in this late night that God has major plans for you, plans that are out of this world and you wouldn't even be able to imagine where they would begin. Just know that God loves you, and He will allow you to be with that daughter of his, but you will have to go through thick for her. You will have to fight against the current, against insurmountable odds for her because His daughter is not one anyone can have."
'I would do anything to be with her, Father, you know how she makes me feel, I'll demonstrate to you that for your precious gift no action will be too small.'
"The trials and tribulations you will go through will test the limits of your humanity, of your mercy, of your faith and trust in God. All of this for a chance with His beautiful daughter. It will all happen as a test to make sure that YOU WILL BE THE BEST FOR HER!"
'Well, that's a bit extreme, but I guess I'm willing to do anything to fight for the love I've finally found.'
"Now let me just say a quick prayer for you, Dear Heavenly Father, look at this brother that is on the other side of this screen right now, he has no idea what he will have to go through to be with your daughter, but he knows it will be worth it. Only you know the path ahead of him, and I pray that he stays strong in your faith and doesn't give up when things seem like they're about to drown him. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!"
'Amen to that, I guess that's my cue from God, letting me know that things won't be all rosy, Well, it's time I knock out.' I put my phone on my nightstand and stand up to turn off my lights. As I'm making my way over to the switch, I stop at my desk and look at some of the schematics I had laid out on top of architectural drawings of houses and buildings.
"Nothing but wishful thinking," I say out loud as I look at the sketches of mechs and some missiles. "One thing's for sure, though: if Lockheed Martin comes knocking, I'm definitely accepting their salary. Who needs morals anyway? I'm just making the weapons, not firing them." I say as I turn off the lights and get into my bed.
"Why am I so unfulfilled? I got more than many people will ever have. I make an incredible amount of money due to my designs being more than desired for the firm, paying for a 2 bedroom apartment in Downtown Manhattan that costs me $6,300 a month, got a beautiful view, an alright SUV (Base model Dodge Durango), well, money is the least of my worries. Why am I even wasting my time in grad school for Architecture, it's not like a master's is going to get me any better than I already am, too?"
"Jesus, I guess I just need love, someone else to live with me in this cold and lonely apartment. Well, it seems like it won't be empty for much longer."
As I was contemplating all that I've done in life, I drifted off into sleep. I had quite a strange dream, though. I was in a mech in some place I can't recognize for the life of me. I was leading a platoon of other mechs, and we were pinned. With every passing moment, the enemy fire was growing stronger. I saw one of my mechs that panicked get shredded to scrap as he stood up and tried to make a run for it. I watched every mech that was part of my team get scrapped, and then there was me.
The enemy fire stopped, and an overwhelming feeling of doom reigned over me. I decided it would be best to lay down my mech's rifle and sword and raise my hands over the small ridge I was taking cover in. I noticed that they didn't open fire at my actions and decided to step out into the open. What I saw left me speechless. Over 150 mechs were making their way towards me in no rush. All around me lay the destroyed mechs of my comrades, of my men. I felt weightless. At that same moment, "Skyfall" by Adele started playing somewhere in the background.
"This is the end…Hold your breath and count to ten."
*Thump* *Thump* *Thump* *Thump*
The footsteps of the enemy mechs were in perfect sync with the piano.
"Feel the Earth move and then, hear my heart burst again."
I saw all the enemy mechs come to a stop, and then a single enemy mech with decorated gold accents on its sleek black paint made its way towards me, alone. I could feel the hairs on my body rise as I felt uncontrollable fear and dread. This mech, no, this beast was going to kill me, and it was going to enjoy it.
"Aspen! It's too late to want to give up. We've already killed your men, and you're all that's left of this futile resistance." A voice spoke to me from the mech. I felt an immediate familiarity with the voice of the person piloting that mech.
"AJAX! YOU! YOU WERE MY BROTHER!" I found myself saying these words, an overwhelming rage burning up inside me.
"You were foolish, Aspen, to think that I, of all people, would ever stand with you. You know what you did to me! You stole the woman I loved." The man responded.
"What? So, this is what this is all about?" I replied.
"I told you how I felt about her, and you still took her from me!" I could hear the rage in his words.
"What the fuck are you going on about? By the time you had confessed to me how you felt for her, Autumn and I were already dating. Did you happen to take a hit to your head to think that she was yours just because you confessed your love for her to me? Not to mention, she had rejected you and chosen me before I even knew you were trying to woo her. Did you think your confession to me would make me leave her?" I asked, mockingly.
"You're right, but that's not something either you or I has to worry about anymore. I made sure that bitch watched every bit of the things I did." He replied back, and stifled laughter could be heard.
"You…..what are you talking about?" A frown spread across my face as my voice became more silent, the feeling of despair starting to drape over me.
"I made sure she watched every second as I skinned your daughters alive," he said, the mockery in his voice clear.
"What? No-no….you-you wouldn't...A-aa-ajax you were their uncle… S-surely you wouldn't…..t-tell me you- tell me you are fucking with me." Those words blindsided me, and I immediately started choking up. Images of two little girls I had never seen in my life started flashing across my mind, followed by love for them, a conflicting feeling as they felt strange to me.
"Why don't you ask your wife whether or not I'm bullshitting?" Ajax responded as a commotion behind him happened, mechs moving out of the way as a woman made her way through, her figure dwarfed by the size of the mechs around her. Her eyes filled with tears, and in her arms, she held the limp red bodies. My heads-up display immediately scanned the woman and the 2 figures in her arms, and the information popped into my feed.
*Autumn Del Santo:
Age: 33
Height: 5'8"
Citizen of the Empire of Trent
Spouse to Aspen Del Santo*
*Alicia Del Santo
Age: 4
Height: 3'0"
Citizen of the Empire of Trent
Daughter of Aspen Del Santo*
*Aria Del Santo
Age: 4
Height: 2'9"
Citizen of the Empire of Trent
Daughter of Aspen Del Santo*
"No," I felt my worldview shatter at this sight. This woman was identical to the Autumn I'm planning on having a date with on Sunday. And these girls...t-they-they're my daughters.
"Let the sky fall, when it crumbles, we will stand tall and face it all together…"
The song kept on playing in my head as my eyes became blurred. I lost all strength in me, and my mech, as if it were a part of me, fell to its knees. Its red, blue, and golden accents on top of its white paint shone in the setting sun. As I'm about to open my cockpit, Autumn stops in front of my mech and mouths the words "I love you…" just before a giant mech sword batted her away, her frail body slamming into a nearby rock.
My eyes tracked her broken body and watched it slump next to the rock. With the last of her strength, she managed to give me one last smile before her eyes lost their shine and she died.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" I screamed and stood up, my failing strength restored by an unbridled rage, my mech's dwindling energy reserves being used up within a moment.
I grabbed Ajax's sword by its blade and yanked it away from him, and in a swift move, I decapitated 7 mechs that had surrounded me while this all took place. Ajax, in complete fear and disbelief, attempted to retreat, only to trip and fall back as I launched an assault on him, sending his own blade through where his cockpit should be.
"YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs as a warm sensation spread on the left side of my body. I look over and notice the shaft of a spear that had torn through the cockpit of my mech, taking the entirety of my left side with it.
"Oh..." I managed to barely muster as I started to slip into death's embrace. As my consciousness began to fade, I heard Ajax's voice over the open comms say, "Good thinking on modifying the $^%^#8 and changing the cockpit's positioning, I would've definitely died there if it wasn't for you, Va^&^@."
'You lucky bitch,' I think to myself and my consciousness finally faded.
"Ahh! H-huh… wh-what? Oh, oh, *swallows* ... It was just a nightmare... ah..." I wake up panting heavily and drenched in sweat. "What the fuck? That felt….so….so real"
I grabbed my phone and saw that the time was 1:34 PM. "God," I say as I rub my eyes, "Thank God for the weekend, slept so damn much. Jesus Christ, what a fucking nightmare." I said out loud as I got up from my bed and went to my bathroom to take a shower.
